Heaven Talks, But Not To Me
by Sephideth
Summary: It hits you hard when you realise you're dead.. but it hits you even harder when you find out that you're stuck in a freaking limbo between heaven and earth with someone who's not even from our world. Sunny/OC
1. Chapter 1

"My heart hurts and it stings,  
That's just what love brings..  
Hurt, silence and tears."

* * *

Bad time, bad place that's where I am, a collision. It hit Me. Hard. Than what? Of course. Something I thought of as a dream. I woke up and I was not with him. The answer to everything is; death. Suddenly... it just took away my breath...

* * *

"Solstice! Wake up! You'll be late for school again!" My mother's shouting was always loud... I hate it when it's so loud especially in the morning.

"Mom... I'm awake just don't shout anymore please..." I just hate mornings, I'm always groggy and still half asleep. Oh, and stiff too.

Standing up and going to the bathroom to change, for a short time I stood before my mirror and just stared at it.

"Wonder if I'll ever change, huh?"

But just so that you know, I'm Solstice Carrose. A creepy teenager with idiotic dreams, always had them and always will. How old am I you ask? Seventeen. The dreams I always have are just flashbacks of a previous day or so, nothing major.

Washing my teeth, looking into my own eyes in the mirror, there's something odd with them, I could never tell what... I really don't know, it's just the feeling of somthing wrong, never could put my finger on it so don't ask.

Changing into my clothes, a black t-shirt with an illuminati insignia and leggings I was out of my bathroom making my way to the kitchen where m mother was, She's just slightly smaller than me now.. We don't really look similliar. I've got all of my features from my father. Like my long black hair and piercing blue eyes.

"Hi mom" She jumped a little bit, _didn't hear me coming did ya?_

"Finally, you're awake!" She exclaimed.

"Yeah, yeah I'm awake, what's for breakfast today?" I asked her a litlle irritated. Yeah mornings are not made for me.

"Help yourself." _Haha very funny, thank you very much!_

"Sure, I'm out" And Just like that I was on my way to the door, puting on my shoes and grabing my schoolbag, I was out of the house.

A really nice weather awaited me outside like... rain. emYay! Rain! Maybe add a little sugar too wont ya?! I didn't even take my coat with me! /emMaking my way down the street I saw some people from my school, Those playboys and overly girly girls. Ignoring them I was going to the traffic lights but something caught my eye... like a little kid running trough the street and behind him, his mother trying to catch him. And just then I realized the arriving truck from the distance. Well if "panic" is the word enough to describe my feeling at that moment, than it's not enough to describe my actions.

Just like that I was out on the street, shoving the kid to the side just a second before the truck hit me. And it hit Me. Hard. One second I was there and the next I was out cold.

* * *

AN: So, this is my first ff, it's short and not professional. I hope to improve thought. There are a lot of errors in this one, short chapter and I'm aware of that. So please if you don't like it,

just ignore it. It's just a small request from me. Still if you liked it, RR!


	2. Chapter 2

"In the forest of my mind,

There life beings only of my kind."

* * *

"Is she going to be alright?"

"Mrs. And Mr. Carrose, it's really hard for me to tell you this... but your daughter sadly passed away just after we got her to the emergency room.."

* * *

For my family it was a reall strugle now. They didn't know when I was going to wake up, or if I was ever going wake up... That's sad isn't it? One day everything is normal and the next one? It's hell. It's like everything you have is just disappearing. You can cry, beg, all you want but nothing is going to change what happened, nothing is going to turn back time. So what about me then? Sleeping in my bed peacefully? Not really... that day everything just began. The sadness, joy, love, hate, it was just the beginning of something big and at the same time it can be an end of my own sanity... The dream of my life.

* * *

It was dark, there was nothing. I just felt like I wasn't breathing anymore, a void of blackness. It's cold and I'm alone, it's such an awful feeling. I tried to open my eyes but it felt like someone was closing them for me, like I couldn't do anything myself. I tried to scream, cry, beg someone to help but there's just... no one. It's just me, my mind and the darkness. I always kept hoping for something, or rather someone to help me.

And just one split second I feel warm, just like someone, somehow is holding my hand. A small action of assurance.

I try to open my eyes but still nothing. Every time I tried hope slipped away from I just want to see what it is!

 _Try! Sol, just try again! Again and again and again. How much time did pass? How long am I here already? I want to see my family! I want to go back! Please! Someone..._

I can feel our fingers entwining, I feel it but can't see it. It's like a ghost, it's there but at the same time it doesn't feel like there is really someone.

Then there is another hand touching my face, just like that my eyes shot open just to see a flying orb of energy in front of me. I can't make out what it is... I don't really know what to think about that either..

The orb let's out a small flicker of light and there's a flashback of a fight, no, no, it's war going out there! There are people... the military... and there are robots? There are so many of them,

I can't even follow them with my eyes, they're just fighting too quickly for me to catch up with my slugish movements.

I blink my eyes once and the scene changes. I see myself standing next to a desk, looking at a picture. I try to creep closer to see it but success only halfway, just to take a glimpse of it.

There in the middle, I stand with a man that is in his early twenties, holding his hand. There are militay men all around us, and in the back... there are big metalic creatures.

 _Who are they? Or rather what are they...?_

Once more, I blink. I see my mother and father sitting on the couch, both of them, they're crying... my mother looks so broken, I nevers saw her in such a state. And my father? He holds her close, silent tears rolling down his face.

 _Just what happened..?_

The third time I blink, everything around me turns black. The orb in front of me, it makes a small whine, a sad one, it feels desperate, it wants something.

Slowly I stretch my hand out to it. Just a small touch... It's getting warmer and warmer..

The blue orb makes one last sound of distress and vanishes, leaving me all alone once more in the darkness.

 _Please... no..._

* * *

 _"Under a tree at quarter three, I had some hope in me._

 _But life was taken from me, but I did not feel_

 _I made a vow within my gown that love will come to me but then he came and seemingly I had been found_

 _What will become of my dear friend? Where will his actions lead us then?_

 _What is this, a painful twist, is this a bitter kiss? There's so much life left in his eyes, it should not end like this_

 _My dreams were slain, my face was stained with memories of my pain._

 _But peace still came, I'll give him the same and I will be okay_

 _And will we ever_

 _end up together?_

 _No, I think not, it's never to become_

 _For I am not the one."_

* * *

AN: Hello guys! It may not be a long chapter but hey, it's there! And I want to _thank QueenOfTheSilver98, CrackleShot-the-Sparkeater_ and _Don't judge me I'm a Fangirl for the nice reviews_! And of course those who followed or favourited this story, It really means a lot to Me I'm sorry for the errors though again (I think I'll be sorry for that in every chapter) See you next time! Big loves!Sephi out!


	3. Chapter 3

Cold. Lonely. Alone. It feels like being drowned in a deep sea, with no end to it, no limit of time. Just nothing. Yet when I opened my eyes for the first time after my last encounter with the blue orb everything around me had a new color. The sky, grass, trees, animals... everything. I just stood there in the middle of the field staring away into the distance, past the sky, stars, galaxies, wondering who I was. The only thing I remember is my name and this big blue orb of warmth, oh and of course that I'm dead. But the questions like where's my family? Where am I? Am I alone here? Bugged at the back of my head.

Only when I took a step forward did I notice, it felt like walking on water. Every step I took made a small wave... just like when someone tosses a small stone into a puddle of water.

 _Where am I?_

After a small walk to the nearest tree did I notice, yet again, the blue orb. Just sitting there... and making those small silent noises which resembled humming. The warmth of it made me itch closer.

Just the moment I stretched my hand out to touch it...

"Don't come near me human" _what?_

Quickly I recoiled from it, hiding slightly behind a tree and peeking out, watching it closely.

"What are you? Rather, who are you?" _Yeah, sure be pushy about the questions!_

"I'm not someone you should talk to." The voice sounded almost disappointed, couldn't really catch on to that.

"Why?"

"Because you don't belong here."

 _what?_

 _I know that I'm in some unknown place and that I've got to get out of here as soon as I can... but I want some answers to my questions! Ew.. this orb isn't a nice one._

"You say that I don't belong here, yet here I am talking to you." On the other hand... I feel like I didn't talk to someone in ages.. "I don't believe it's coincidence, isn't it?"

"Maybe. Your eyes see what they want to see. Look closely and you'll find out 'what I am'."

And just like that I saw it.

The orb disappeared beneath a panel of dully painted gold. Big messy scratches all over it. In a matter of seconds I saw something that I can't even describe properly.

 _There, under the tree, at quarter three_  
 _Is this what my eyes can see?_  
 _The gold like appearance,_  
 _In it's fully glory?_

Probably every human would've already run away, shrieking and howling for help. Yet I stood there observing 'him'. His body language was relaxed but his eyes seemed tired. I can't really tell how big he was, but he seemed really tall. On his head he had some fins that looked like horns, his hand were clawed, they looked just like knifes. His eyes? A drowning ocean. Deep blue. A hidden kindness just underneath the surface.

I just stared to no end at him and he looked like he liked it. A smug expression on his face.

"What's your name?" I asked him in a whisper.

"Is this your concern right now? Shouldn't you figure out how to go back to the living?"

Staring at him I shook my head. "I'm dead apparently."

"In that case... you're stuck here."

* * *

AN: Hello there again! So I decided to try one more time something with this story, and let's just see what comes out of it. Again, there may be some erros so.. just ignor them. Thank you for reading, if u liked it please R&R!


	4. Chapter 4

"What? Why should I be stuck here?" The questions flared in my mind. How is it that it's just me and him. I don't even know what he is or what's his name!

"It's not a daily sight to see a human soul in one of the broken twin bonds.."  
 _What is he talking about? Twin bond?_

"Twin bonds? What are you talking about?"

"You see squishy... in my world there's something like a twin bond between bots that were from the same creator, just like your human twins. It's rare to see a twin in its glory, but two at the same time? That's almost a blessing in your terms! But it's not happening, there's no chance of me meeting him again. And you know why? Because my spark was extinguished even before I could meet him after millenias of being lost in fragging space!" He roared like a mad animal. It made me a little afraid but I stood in my place.

My mind really couldn't grasp what he was talking about.. lost in space, Dead, not meeting his brother.. lost family?

Looking into his eyes I saw the hurt in them. The sorrow, sadness, grief. It just made me want to cry myself.

"Why are you dead..?"

"After millenias of traveling through the space I finally received a signal from my lieder Optimus Prime that he's on this planet with our team... and my brother." He closed his eyes and turned his head away breaking the eye contact with me. " I was almost in the atmosphere... when that glitch Starscream appeared literally from nowhere, the scanners of my shuttle couldn't even catch him! I was dead immediately, the engine exploded too quickly..." Turning his head my way again he kept watching me. "Tell me human, why are you even here? Shouldn't you be in your heaven or whatever you call it?"

I was unsure how to answer him mostly because even I don't have the answer.

"I do not know... I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be dead either! It's too much for me! I don't even know who I am properly, the only thing I know is that my name is Solstice! And that I'm dead too..." I looked at the ground beneath me, somehow the strands of grass seemed interesting suddenly.

"I don't want to be here... I don't belong here as you see." Somehow I wanted to cry, but no tears came. The only thing that showed my distress were my trembling hands.

"Yes, you do not belong here. But I believe it can't be helped. I was alone for almost 40 fragging human years! I'm not used to talking anymore..."

"Then how log am I here already? I just woke up yet I saw once a blue orb just like you..." I can't remember it even probably.

"Yes it was me. That was 7 human years after I died."

"Then how long am I here?"

"33 years to be precise. I felt your presence since the first time you came here, you didn't really show up until today."

So I'm gone already for 33 years, how old was I even before I died? I don't know. How is my family doing, are they alright? Did I have even a family? Is there an option for me to remember? Can't I just go to heaven? Why isn't anything always going the easy way?!

I sat down with a thud on the grass a little further from him. Staring into the sky, I wondered how how things were going to be now.

"What am I going to do now..?" I just want to be at peace..

"We can't really do anything." Is this how we end up? Staring the whole time into space? Watching how the humans live without them knowing we're even here? "The only thing that really can solve this is my twin dying.. I don't want to see that happening any time soon."

"So what do we do?" What are we going to do? I don't want to be stuck in one place for God knows how many years!

"We wait."

"For what?"

"For a miracle.." He doesn't seem like a believer type... but yeah, what can I say about someone like him?

"Beside that you never told me your name..."

"Do you really care about it so much? " Well if we're going to be stuck here for God knows how long then yeah...

"Yeah, I believe it does.."

"Name's Sunstreaker"

* * *

 _In a nocturnal state of mind_

 _Children of the night_

 _But it's the only way alive_

 _This black hole's pulling me inside_

 _Of this black heart, this black soul_

* * *

AN: Next day, next chapter! Big thanks to _Edges05_ for liking my story and the review! Many thanks for those who followed this story as well! It really makes me want to keep going and to try harder! Please R&R! I like to hear what you think about it until now! The chapters are still short but I believe they will be longer with time. See you next time! 


	5. Chapter 5

_**Edges05 : Thank you yet again for the nice review! And I hope you'll like this chapter as well.**_

 _ **Autobot-Bre-Lightblast: It really makes me happy that you like it this far! Yes, I'm sorry for the grammar mistakes, I'll try to improve but I can't promise anything big. English isn't my main language that's why there may be even MANY of those errors.. and I'm really sorry for that mostly becouse I really can't do anything about. But I'll try to do my best! I hope you'll like this chapter!**_

* * *

I'm stuck, literally. I'm being squished like a bug between two realities. I really liked observing what goes around me, but this is a different stage of it. Able to see, yet you were the one who was unseen by others. Did touch matter? Not really. Every human I tried to touch, every time I tried, my hope broke away piece by piece. I was just a lost soul in a separated reality.

So what about my memories? Gone. I don't remember anything. I tried to search for my place of death but there was no luck at all. I didn't even have a clue where to start! But I did it anyway even though there was any hope left, searching random graveyards for my name engraved on one of the tombstones. I didn't find anything.

Time really flew by much quicker here. But not for everyone...

Every time I returned from my search I found Sunstreaker always sitting on his spot beside the tree, starring off into the distance. He wasn't the talkative type, he wasn't up for a kasuall talk. He just observed the world around him in silence. Every time I asked him something I was given an answer yet I never had to answer his questions. Why? Because he never gave me any.

Sometimes I just want to talk his ears off yet I know that I can't. He would just ignore it. Even though he was alone for such a long time he never opened up, never told me anything about his brother, family, where he came from.. and I'm just a small curious human soul. Wish I could talk with him normally.

"Hey Sunstreaker, do you want to play a little game?" Sometimes I was really bored. How about a little Q&A Sunshine? I hope he's going to finally tell me something about himself.

"What game this time human?"

As always he seems not to be really interested about it. Nothing new.

"'Human' is not my name! Nor 'Squishy' and 'Bug'! Stop calling me that! I told you it's Solstice." Oh how he annoyed the crap out of me with those freaking nicknames! Could've kicked him for it but I wouldn't achieve anything with it so yeah... "Going back to the game. How about a round of Q&A? Are you in for that? I'm really, really bored today."

'Please say yes, please say yes...'

"Do you really intend to ask me to play this game everyday even though you know I'm going to say no?" 'Crap...'

"Oh please Sunny! Just this once! I promise I'm not going to bug you anymore about this!" _Come on, Crack already!_

"Don't call me that." He quickly looked down to me with a deadly glare.

"Oops... I'm sorry.. Sunstreaker." He looked back up to the sky with a muffled 'hmpf' sound. "Soo.. can we play? Pretty please?" Oh man I felt like a little kid now.

"Ugh... human.." Oh, no you don't.

"Don't call me that!" I shouted at him with a small pout. Now he looked at me like I grew a second head.

"...I mean Solstice. Just promise me it's going to be the first and the last time we play it." Yeah, whatever you say Sunshine.

"Sure!" _Hell yeah! Finally cracked him._ "Do you want to begin?"

"Not really..." _Knew it._

"Oookay.. so where did you come from?" I asked him plopping down on the grass just beside his hip.

"Is this really your first question?" What the hell mate.

"What? Do you want me to ask you something like how your robo 'sex equipment' works? Nope, nopedido, never, nada, nein." Not today, not in this life. Maybe in the next one.

I believe he was a little embarrassed about it.. but never mind.

"Soo I'm going to ask again, where did you come from?" Are those questions really that hard to answer?

He made a small sigh noise trough his nose.

"My home is on the planet Cybertron, many, many galaxies away from yours. That's where I come from, and that's the place I'm never going to return to." Now I get it. He didn't want to talk about it because he know he's going to break down at some point.

"Sunstreaker, try to remember the good times, not the bad ones." I told him sincerely. It's what I try to do all the time but it never fully worked. Well mostly because I don't remember anything.

"Soo.. what was your brothers name?" This bugged me for a long time now.

"His name was Sideswipe. He was a pretty big glitch but still my brother." The sorrow in his eyes wasn't hidden anymore.

"Did you have a girlfriend? Can you even have one?" Slowly I was getting more interested.

"...Before the war broke loose I had a femmefriend but her spark was extinguished soon after the Decepticons bombarded her hometown."

"...War?" They had a war? Is this the reason why he was shoot down? He was in a different fraktion?

"Yes, war. You heard me right femme. The reason why our planet died is this fragging war! We payed the price. Now others have to pay it for us.."

"How long were you alone?"

"Thousands of your human years."

"What about your family?" And with that he turned his head in my direction and looked down to me, his eyes begging me to stop yet he didn't say a thing.

"They were slaughtered before our eyes, even before the war broke loose. We were taken to the gladiator pits."

"Gladiator pits?" _Is this something like our old gladiator arena?_

"I believe it's enough for one day.."

"Bu-"

"Enough." That was harsh… but I understood that. I crossed over the line today.

"Sorry…"

* * *

AN: I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please let me know what you think about it! It really makes me happy when I see a notification pop up on my phone from fanfiction. Thank you as well for those who followed my story! I hope you guys liked it as well! See you in the next one!


	6. Chapter 6

Days. Weeks. Months. Years. How long am I going to search for what was left of me in the world of living? I was tired of it. So, so tired. Is this really my fate? Is this how I'm going to exist? Never finding answers of who I was? Well. It seems like it. Someone above doesn't want me to know about what I did when I was among the living or who I was, that's what I believe. They're just laughing at my attempts to find something aren't they? Laughing at what I am now and how I ended up in a limbo with a dead split spark twin.

Time just passes so quickly. The trees around the place we always hang out started to rot. Old, broken branches scattered all around the clearing we always sat. That's the definition of how much time has passed. It was rare to find a human at this place. No wonder, everything started to look like a graveyard without the tombstones. This place changed from a beautiful oasa to a haunted forest in a really short time by our standards. It was just scary how it all changed...

When I asked Sunny to change our place to 'hang out' he always refused. At the beginning he didn't want me to know the reason why he wouldn't leave with me!

After some time and many talks with him I finally understood the reason why he wanted to stay so badly here.

"Sunny can't we really move to another place? This one is starting to get scarier and scarier..." That was the sad truth. Everything around uz looked rotten, old. The trees, grass, flowers. The once beautiful and livid colors were now dull with no emotion and live in them.

"I told you so many times Sol, I can't." It really always disturbs me when he doesn't want to tell me something! It's like I worry for him yet I don't want to show it... But the plus is he gave me a nick name!

What I never thought was that he's such a softie inside. He looks like he's all bark, no bite. Believe me. But I know that he's got a pretty dark side inside him. It's not something I'm ready to see.

Aaand finally I had to let it out didn't I...?

"Will you finally tell me why?! I don't want to go without you and you know it!" Yes, I won't go without him mostly because he's the only person I can talk to, yet I won't leave him because I know he'll be all alone again. And somehow... I don't want that to happen.

"And why won't you go without me? You know you're free, I'm not holding you here." I get it, I get it that he's not holding me here but it's something I can't describe THAT'S holding me here. I don't know, is it a feeling? Or maybe just the loneliness? More questions, no answers.

"I know I'm free, it's just... the thing is I don't want to leave you and I don't want to be alone." _Smart Sol, sure just tell him everything what's on your mind!_

"I'm chained to this place."

 _What?_

"Why?"

"Remember when I told you about the time I found my own body?" Yeah, I do. He told me once his story of finding his body. He found it melted in with a tree. Simply said: nature took his body over. But never did he tell me where it was.

 _Now that you think about it..._

"It's... it's under that tree isn't it? It's buried just underneath it, isn't it?"

He just looked at me. No emotion in his ocean deep optics. He just let out a small nod with his head as an affirmative.

"What would happen if you left it here? What would happen If you went with me...?"

"My soul is still trapped within my body. If I move too far away it will break loose." _What..._ why won't he do that?! He would finally be free!

"You would be free from this place if you let your soul out of your body! Why won't you do it?!" I was slowly getting really angry at him, he has the chance to leave! Why won't he leave? Why won't he just do it...?

"If I let go of my soul, I would drag my twin with me. He can still live. I want him to live. I want him to feel the happiness of being alive. The joy of having your comrades around you, your friends, maybe even a lover. I want him to be happy. Even if it prevents me from going to the well of sparks."

Even if it prevents him from his own happiness...

And just like that my eyes started to water up.

"I'll stay." I said wiping away my hot yet at the same time cold tears.

 _I won't leave him. I don't want to._ Is it silly? Am I being selfish? I don't care. He's the only one I can talk to. And I like him the way he is. Arrogant, bitchy about his paint, war hardened warrior, a frontliner, someone I liked to talk to, even when insults are thrown my way. I didn't care. I always talked to him, even when he didn't want me to. And I'm going to continue it.

"And why's that? Why won't you go?" _I believe that's pretty obvious. I want to keep you company, accept it you tincan. Yeah I know you don't like me but shove it up, I'm staying._

"Is just want to keep you company. Am I not allowed? Even if I'm going to move, I'm going to do it with you. I don't care if you're as stubborn as me. You can wait? I'll wait too."

And wait we did.

Someone watched the time ticking by? No? That's alright. We neither.

* * *

AN: Hello! I'm back! I tried to make this chapter a little more 'interesting' and with some more emotion to it but yeah... I don't know if this turned out well. As always a big THANK YOU to those who reviewed and followed this story. I'm so grateful that someone even likes it! Please let me know what you think about this chapter, it really makes me happy to see a new review and someones opinion about it! Please R&R!


	7. Chapter 7

Day after day we watched our place being dissolved into nothingness. Leaf after leaf fell down from the branches. They took down every of our trees. Everything looked so dull... so lifeless. There wasn't much left. After those.. those monsters! Barged in in our home and destroyed everything!

We were sitting in our usual place, watching the sunrise. The sky was painted in those beautiful warm colors. The sunbeams were shimmering over the horizon.

Sunstreaker got used to my touch and presence with due time, now I've got the privilege of sitting on his shoulder! What made me really happy is the fact that he didn't even make a big deal out of it, that's odd when we're talking about Sunshine here. He and his paint, my God.

"Hey, Sunny can I sit on your shoulder? It's a better view from up there..." I asked him with my eyes fixed on the horizon. Those sunbeams painting our surroundings with new, warm colors.

Without answering me, he took me in his hand and put me on his shoulder.

"Don't touch the audio-fins." Made that mistake once.. don't intend to make it a second one. He nearly threw me off from his shoulder!

Silence engulfed us as we just sat there, enjoying the view. The sky constantly changing colors. It all seemed... like a dream. Like something out of someone's imagination, put on the display in a muzeum. Everything...everything of it looked just like a painting. A painting a familiar face made...

"Say Sunstreaker... what did you do before you died? I don't mean the war now." I was really curious, did he have a job? Could they even have a job? Maybe a hobby or something?

"I was a painter. The best Cybertron could ever have, my face was known everywhere. Sometimes even when I was walking down our street I could hear whispers, mechs and femmes whispering about me, always asking themselves 'how can this be that he can do it and I can't?' 'Wish I could be like him' 'Look it's Sunstreaker! Should we ask him for a portret?' I never cared less about their words. I never cared about what they said when I turned them down." That's harsh even for you Sunny...

"Something changed your line of thoughts?" Something in his voice told me that someone made a change in his life, but it seemed like it wasn't from his choice... With time everyone has to change... even when they don't want to. Sometimes the 'change' is just forced on them. Shoved in their face with a screaming force.

"Yes... one day I was on my way to an art shop to buy supplies, I was running low on paint. On my way there two femmes stopped me, asking if I had some time to go out with them for some high grade. Of course I denied their offer. I told them that I do not go out with some low class femmes. Of course they ran away, crying. It was really harsh of me now that I think about it..."

Did he really just think about that?! Didn't it occur his mind a bit earlier that he was a freaking ass to them? Oh man if I could just... ugh no.

"While I watched them run away, another femme came up from behind me, tapping me on my shoulder. Of course as I looked over, to look who it was I received a pretty big blow to my helm. She throw her fist at me! Never in my entire life had I received a blow from a femme. A femme!"

As I looked at his face plates his expression slowly changed... a small smile creeping on his features. Something in those memories made him happy. At that I smiled as well.

"We had a 'small talk' on the street, it was so loud that some of the residents of the nearby unit called some 'cops' on us as you humans call it. We got separated. For a long time I didn't see her. One time I decided to try out the new club which opened a few cycles before the accident. Of course I took my brother with me."

Ooooh, so they went to parties as well! Now that's going to be fun.

Well I think so?

"So as we drank some high grade I saw a pretty big crowd of mechs surrounding someone and I decided to investigate it. Just as I came closer I saw the femme. The exact same one which threw a fit on me on the street! Those mechs around her tried to hit on her and judging from the expression on her face, she didn't like it. At all. I decided to interfere a little. And I mean, I literally threw those mechs to the ground. As she saw what I did, she looked at me like she saw a ghost, those big blue orbs just staring at me with confusion. I just asked her if she was alright... and she started to cry. I didn't even knew the reason!

I really didn't know what to do about it... it's not my type to comfort... or even talk to someone I don't know. So I just put my hand on her shoulder and asked what her designation was. Zion. That's what she was called. Since then we became friends, lovers."

His face expression changed so quickly. From the most happy one to the most saddened one.

How is it that happiness can die so quickly? How is it that everything we love is so short lived? Pain is always there, always waiting for our most vulnerable moment. It's always waiting in the dark with its friends, sadness, hurt and stress.

After thinking a little bit more about it, it hit me. If he could just let his soul out.. he could see her again. He could meet her again. He could touch, feel, and love her again. Like he did when he was alive.

Yet.

Yet he's stuck. Here. With me. Awaiting the end days of his brother.

"Sunny... what do you think, how long will this go on? How long are we destined to be stuck here?" It pained me to see him like that. It pained me to not even know who I was. I envy him.

But. If I found my body and tried to move away my soul would get free as well. I didn't see the place yet. I don't know where my soul is. First I have to find it but then... I will be stuck to the place where it lies buried.

I won't be able to see Sunny then.

"How long you ask? How long will this pain go on? I don't have the answers to this. I wish I had. But yes. I have enough of it as well. I love my brother, I love him the most in this world. I will wait for him and I don't care how long it will take."

And being the crybaby here, I started crying. Wailing and shrieking.

"I have e-enough of this! I-I want us to be free! I can't take this anymore! I don't know who I am, I don't know the time, I don't know even where to search!"

I hate it. I hate it so much. I don't know how long I'll hold on. I don't know how much sanity was left in me.

"Sol..."

Slowly I looked up to him only to see hist expression turn from hurt to sad. I extended my hands towards him. Right now I didn't care that he's the mighty Sunstreaker of Kaon. I didn't care about my own pride. For fucks sake he's the only one who can hear me!

He brought up his right hand to me at which I almost threw myself on. After such a long time, I needed some comfort. And he's the only one who can give it to me.

I hugged his hand to me, afraid of letting go. I just sat there, crying. Holding on him like he was my last lifeline even thought I was already dead.

"I'm sorry..." I started. I was really sorry for breaking down on him

"For what?' He asked me pretty much confused.

"For crying."

"Solstice... you don't have to apologize to me for something as minor as that." Where was the menacing Sunstreaker you ask? I don't know. He changed? Or maybe I grew on him? Dunno.

Just as we sat there now in silence, earth underneath us started to tremble.

"You hear that?" He asked me.

"What?" What is he talking about?

"Those sounds... something big is approaching." He glanced over his right shoulder, only to see.. the trees falling.

"Wha-?... No! The trees!" Every single one of them started to fall, one after another.

I glanced at Sunstreaker and back at our surroundings. What was happening?

"What's going on Sunny?!" I was starting to panic.

"I don't know!"

Suddenly over the lying trees a bulldozer emerged driving in our direction. In the direction of Sunnys tree. In the direction of his soul...

"We have to do something or your tree will be crushed!" I shrieked at him, still with my face wet from my tears.

He reached out to me. Took me in his hand and put me to the side.

For the first time. Ever. Did I see him stand up to his full high. To his full beauty. Man... this was so mesmerizing. Every gear in his body after such a long time put again to use. Every plate shifting.

Just as he stood up, he put himself between the tree and the oncoming bulldozer.

"What are you planning to do?!" I shouted at him with all I had.

"Sit and don't interfere." That's the only thing he told me before all hell broke lose.

As I gazed at him, he took a fighting stance. His once beautiful ocean deep optica turned into a burning red color. A menacing grin spread across his face. Claws formed at the tips of his digits. Long, dangerous claws, capable to pierce everything in their way.

How did he intend to use them when we fall through everything we want to touch?

I watched as the bulldozer came nearer and nearer. My fear grew bigger, my knees started to tremble.

What does he intend to do?!

Just as I was about to close my eyes, I heard a human shriek. The whole bulldozer was now in about 30m in the air. Falling in the direction of earth.

How?

How is it possible? WE CAN'T TOUCH THINGS! How did he manage to throw it in the air?! HOW?!

As the bulldozer crashed back to Earth it was all mangled. Parts of it were scattered all around our place.

I saw Sunstreaker closing the distance between him and the bulldozer, crouching before the man who was driving it.

"You my dear human, are disturbing my presence here." he said as his claws closed in on the cockpit of the vehicle, slowly crushing the man.

A painful scream was heard from the man.

"You are not to come here again, understood?" He asked as he started to yet again squish the cockpit. When he heard no answer he dug his claws inside.

"O-okay, okay! No one is going to come here again! I swear!"

And just like that Sunstreaker grinned. He took the bulldozer and threw it away to the other side of the meadow. I just watched as that guy slowly and painfully got out of the vehicle glancing around muttering under his breath something like 'what the he'll was that' 'was is my imagination? No...'. He didn't see Sunny anymore...?

I watched as the guy tried to get away while limping.

Again, there were questions on my mind. How did he do it? Why could this guy see him? Why didn't he tell me anything about that?

But those questions had to wait.

Sunny slowly turned around and walked back to his spot under the tree. Slowly sitting down.

Silently I walked behind him, concerned with his behavior.

"Sunny... are you alright?" Why was he so silent?

"Silence human." He growled. It made me very wary of him. Fear climbed up my spine.

I took a better look at his face.

His optics flickered between blue and red. It looked like he had a war within, with himself... it made me even more scared. But I was dumb enough to come near him.

"S-sunny are you alright..?" As I said that I touched his leg with one hand. It was a mistake the second I did it...

...Because instantly I was in the air, flying through the high grass and hitting a pretty big rock.

* * *

AN: Hi yet again! So yeah I tried to make this chapter as long as I possibly can and thank you Autobot-Bre-Lightblast for pointing this out! I hope you'll like this one as well! A second thank you goes to Edges05 for the nice review! I will try to make the next chapters as long as this one but I don't promise anything big. Please Review and let me know what you think about it!


	8. Chapter 8

I opened my eyes after I heard loud scratching, someone was ripping something apart, or that's what I thought.

My head was in a lot of pain - I didn't even know that I could feel pain but Oh, well what else is going to be thrown at me? Or am I going to be thrown again? No, scratch that, I don't want to be thrown. That's not fun.

Focusing my eyes on the golden form of Sunstreaker a little further away from me, I noticed him doing something odd... like scratching something into a tree with his claws. He looked really desperate...

What's going on? I don't really get it.

"Sunny...?" I said looking up at him, somehow I was a little sleepy. I felt like I could pass out every moment...

"What are you doing?" I still didn't really catch the fact that I was just been thrown by him. My mind was lagging. Like really really hard.

He turned his head in my direction, that moment I was left speechless. My brain shut down on itself. My eyes locked onto his. Those ocean deep optics were as shocked as mine.

Slowly he looked down at his hands.

They were gone. Slowly turning into something like snow... just falling in it's own direction. Disappearing.

"No!" He shrieked in shock and fear. That got me up from my spot. Making my way with a little pain to him, I took a better look as I got closer.

"Sunstreaker!" I got his attentnion. Finally. This time it wasn't the angry and bad Sunstreaker, this time it was the good Sunstreaker. This was my Sunshine.

"Sol... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry." He started to apologize, Sunny apologizing? That's new...

In one motion he looked straight forward as if staring at someone, listening to something.

"Sunny what's happening to you?" Somehow I got the feeling that I'm not going to see him for a long time now, that thought made me very sad.

He got on his knees, his attentnion back to me. His face was inching closer to mine, I was going to move away just as our foreheads touched, I was so close to his face, it seemed like time has stopped. I got mesmerized with his own being... slowly my hand rose up to touch his cheek. My attention got back to his optics, so deep and... what am I thinking?

I can't probably do something like that.

Second after that a image popped up in my mind, I stared at Sunny with confusion.

"That's Sideswipe. Sol.. can you promise me something?" Of course! Just don't throw me again... on the other hand, is he telepathic or something?

"What?"

"Bring him here. Bring him to me, please. I need him here. I don't have much time. The last time I felt him through our bond he was located in the city called Chicago" Don't tell me he's leaving me alone. I don't want to be alone! I'm scared. I'm scared of being left behind. I'm scared of being forgotten!

Tears started to form at the corners of my eyes.

"You're leaving me?" I asked him, my voice cracked and my lower lip started to quiver. I felt like I could break every moment now. I felt deserted.

He sighed. Hot air gushed out of his vents, straight onto me. "I have to. They want me away from here. They want me with my brother."

Is this a final goodbye?

"Am I going to see you again?" I stared at him, my tears streaming down my face. I won't accept it. I'm not ready to be left alone. Why is this happening?

"I can't promise that." So it is a final goodbye... "I wish I could."

"Why? What made you disappear? I thought you're stuck here until your brother dies!" I was beginning to go into hysterics.

"I used too much of my energy on that bulldozer. It made me weak." A little pause. "I'll be watching over you Sol. You know that." He was halfway gone. A small smile appearing at his features.

Please.. stay.. I won't make it without you.

I had the urge to hug him so much. So I just ran where I thought his body was. Crashing into his leg I hugged it as tight as I could. I cried, hard. Slowly I slid down into a sitting position and still hugged his leg. I felt so weak. Harsh and powerful cries shook my body. What am I going to do?

"Don't l-leave.. please! I want you here..." I felt so desperate to have him here yet at the same time so hopeless.. what could I change? Nothing.

"I know Sol, I know." Slowly his claws stroke my hair, what a nice gesture to let someone know you care.

1/4 of his body was left.

"You know Sunny... even thought y-you were an ass I still liked you... Please promise me it's not the end, that we're going to meet again.." I needed it! I needed this promise! Oh please...

"I promise yet I don't know when." Just stay here...

"I don't care when! I just want to see you again someday!" It was hard for me to breathe. Everything was closing in on me. My throat ran dry.

"Someday..." He looked up at the sky, his optics dimmed slightly. "Sol I've got to go."

My eyes snapped up to his face, oh those optics of his...

"No! Please!" I started to claw at his armor which was not seen anymore.

"I'm sorry..." He traced his claws down my face in a loving gesture. Was that odd? I didn't care. "It's not a goodbye, remember. I'll see you later Solstice."

He's gone.

My wight wasn't perched on his leg anymore, I was left stumbeling back to the ground.

My eyes were wide open. Shocked.

He's gone.

Frantically I searched around "Sunny?" He can't be gone. He just can't!

He's gone.

"Sunstreaker!"

HE'S GONE!

I was left sobbing beside our tree. Oh Sunny...

Gone. Gone. Gone. GONE!

"He left." It came out as a whisper. No one is going to hear me anyway... "He leeeft.." A whine came out. My face was all wet from my tears. Who thought I was going to be the one left behind in the void?

Time started to pass.

He told me to find his brother didn't he?

I didn't have the strength to leave this place behind. How could I go without a guide? I don't want to get lost.

Suddenly I remembered that Sunstreaker left something behind. I turned around, my attention on the tree. Something was scribbled there but I couldn't read it, it wasn't my language. I couldn't read it but I knew that it was a message for his brother.

After a day of sitting on Sunnys place I felt alone... forgotten, unloved, deserted.

Is this how he felt when he was here all alone this whole time? Before I came here? Is this the feeling? How did he manage?

That made me think.

Did he cry? Can he even cry? Was he as sad as me at this moment? I was so devastated. I want to talk to him...

2 days have passed and I still didn't get into gear.

I have to find Sideswipe. I promised didn't I?

Yes... I promised.

But before everythin I had to do something, I had to leave something of me behind. So I stood up and searched for a rather sharp stone, what was I going to do?

I scratched my name into the tree trunk. It was a little messy but it will do.

A small smile crept on my face. Now there was something from me and Sunny here.

I stared at it... it made me sad yet happy at the same time. It made me want to cry and laugh.

I remembered the first time I met him. He was all pissy and arrogant but with time... he changed. He was nice, open.

He's got a monster sleeping inside of him.

But I liked him anyway.

As a friend of course.

...Or that's what I thought.

That doesn't change the fact that he was the only thing that was left important to me, he was there when I needed him. But who was there for him when he needed someone?

I looked at the tree and suddenly I remembered a sentence from a song that made me really confused... is this something important? It felt like it was for me. Everything is just so blurred...

It's like a puzzle, some pieces form already a part of the picture but where is the rest?

"... I still wonder why, you left with her and left me behind...

... take your hands off him...

... cause he's the only one I've ever loved...!"

I sang it along with the melody in my head, I felt dumb to be honest. How could I remember it? Is it something from the time I was alive? Apparently.

It were just snippets of the song, not every sentence even matched. But it was something. I could remember something.

The lyrics of the song made me think, but it's something I'm afraid to admit. I believe it's too early say it... isn't it?

* * *

He is restless at night,

He has horrible dreams.

So we lay in the dark,

Cause we've got noting to say.

Just the beating of hearts

like two drums in the grey.

I don't know what we're doing.

I don't know what we've done.

But the fire is coming,

So I think we should run, run, run...

* * *

AN: Hi Hi! Back with the next chapter! This one isn't as long as the last one but I hope you'll like it as well (The next one should be pretty much longer). A big thank you for those who reviewed at the last chapter and to those who followed and favourited this story, I was so happy to see so many reviews, favs and follows! Btw. I decided to mix in DOTM in with this story but with a really different point of view. You'll have to wait and see what's coming!

One more thing! If someone want's to know the names of the songs: Daughter - Run / Daughter - Love


	9. Chapter 9

Four days have passed. Time was ticking by slowly, second by second my heart broke apart more and more. I was numb. I never felt as lonely as now, it's sad... loneliness is so sad it makes me want to crumble. It makes me want to just disappear, just to die in a hole... It's something I don't wish onto anyone. What do people do when they're lonely? They seek a companion. Friendship. Someone to talk to. For me, it's impossible, I can't talk to anyone, I can't touch anyone, I can't even seem to find anyone!

The streets were a free run. Not a single soul was to find on the outskirts of Chicago. I promised. I promised that I was going to find him. And I intend to do so. So here I am, walking through the roads in the city. Everything was empty. No human nor a Cybertronian was in the line of sight. What made me more worried were those broken down houses and skyscrapers. Every step I took was a step closer to hell.

And hell it was.

Slowly decomposed corpses started to appear on the streets, broken cars and streetlights were no more. Everywhere lied rubble, shrapnel and burned pieces of armor.

My eyes were wide open with shock.

What happened with the city? Was it long ago? How did it happen? Is he here?

Those questions were bugging me the whole time till I spotted some old movie poster with a date printed on it.

 _The freaking poster was from 2011. 2011!_

I spend a pretty long time searching around the city, sometime during that I spotted a lone human on a small campfire.

Somehow... I felt sorry for him. What's life when you have no one by your side? Completely alone and forgotten. You have no one who cares about you, the feeling of love lost to the stars. The only voice you hears is the one of wind swishing between the buildings. Is that life?

No.

I don't want to end up like that.

Even though I already am like him, I don't want to admit it. I don't want to believe that I'm already lost. I just... don't want to. I may sound like a stubborn child, but that's because I am. I am a lost child without its memories. A lost child with a slowly fading hope for remembering anything.

 _I am a lost cause, aren't I?_

 _You're not._

I whipped around in the direction of the voice, yet there was no one seen.

 _I'm going insane as well as you see._

 _Stop whining Sol._

Wait... I recognize that voice...

"Sunstreaker?!"

 _The one and only._

"How can you talk to me right now? Where are you? Sunny?!" All I wanted to do was to see him or touch him but I thought it was pretty impossible at that moment even though my heart soared fir it _so much._ I just couldn't even if I wanted to.

There was a moment of silence. The wind flying by made a whining noise. I don't know how long I stood there and waited for him to answer till I started to panic.

"Sunstreaker..?" I was so uncertain, I didn't know what to do.

 _Look around you._

And look around I did. At first, I didn't notice anything, I just searched frantically everywhere and just couldn't see it...

 _The window._

Just to my left, there was a tall building which was made out of big windows. My gaze was glued to it, I watched it intensely. And I saw him. I saw him there, in the reflection. I stood there and he was right beside me. _He was so close and I couldn't reach him._

Slowly I looked to my left and realized he's only seen in the reflections...

I didn't know what was happening I just had the _need_ to touch him. So I did the only thing I could at that time.

I came closer to the glass, there was just his reflection, mine was not to be seen, so I put my hand on the glass with tears already running down my face like a waterfall.

"Oh Sunny..." I was so relieved to just _see him._ I wish I could hug him right here and right now. But I couldn't. Oh, how I wished to just be by his side again. I just wanted to be back at our little spot, just us, the sky and the setting sun.

"How are you doing Sunshine?" I know that he hates that nickname but I just couldn't resist the urge to call him that again.

Smoothly he just kneeled in front of me and put his own servo on the glass from the other side. Such a small gesture made me so happy, I couldn't describe it.

I put my left hand over my mouth, just to let out a muffled cry. I slid to my knees before the glass, resting my forehead against it.

"Please, say something." I started to beg. _I started begging him just to talk, to let me hear his voice._ "Please..." more tears started to run down my face. Oh how I wished he was here.

 _Sol,_

I looked back to his face plates, only to see hurt, sadness, and longing flashing in his beautiful optics.

Only then did I notice.

He was a masterpiece. Art itself.

Sharp jaw, ocean deep optics, lean and well build body, knife like digits... and a spark out of gold. Literally.

 _Don't you dare cry now. It's not the last time we see us. I can promise you that._

His words made me really happy once again. I let myself smile a little.

 _You have a beautiful smile, you know that?_

Now that made me blush and look down again.

Lamely I mutter a "Thank you."

He just smiled at me with those handsome face plates of his.

 _Listen Solstice, I'm here because I had to tell you that he's near, somewhere on the outskirts of the city. You won't miss him, I'm sure of it._

"I'll try my best, I'll bring him back to you." I told him with determination in my voice "But there is one thing..."

 _What is it?_

"How is he going to notice me? Will he be able to see me?"

 _You remember when for a short while I could be seen? Just as that bulldozer came? You'll have to do the same thing._

"How?" I never had the chance really to ask him how he did it. " didn't you... disappear after that?"

 _...Don't use up as much energy as I did, just tell him you're going to show him where his brother is, don't touch anything, and you'll save up as much energy for the walk back to our place, got it?_

"Got it."

 _Good, 'cuz I have to go now._

"What?! No! Wait, can't you stay just a little bit longer?" I get it, I get it. I know I'm a little bit too clingy but I just want to see him a little longer...

 _I'm sorry Sol, they're calling me again. I'll see you at our place later._

"O-okay... I'll see you then." I was sad again, I'm going to be lonely till I find his brother. And God knows how that will turn out.

As I turned my gaze back to the window, he was gone as quickly as he showed up. And so my tears returned for the third time.

"I-I hate being like that..."

I sat there for a little longer, putting my feelings together.

 _Just a little bit more._ I told myself.

 _Just a little bit more..._

I stood up and made my way to the outskirts

Oh, those things you make out of love.

* * *

 _Some kill, some steal, some break your heart  
_ _You and I both know  
_ It's a start  
I've dug two graves for us, my dear  
It's out of love  
To make that clear  
You're so precious to me, my Golden God  
I don't want to let you go out of fear  
If I could act on my revenge, then oh, would I?  
I don't want to let go  
I don't want to cry  
Broken hearts, broken bones  
The bird was killed with two stones  
Those things I want  
Are things that I can't stand

* * *

AN: Hello there! I'm sorry for my absence, my math exam is on Tuesday and I'm so scared of it. At this point, I'm getting ready for it and I'm so afraid that I won't pass. Wish me luck at it. I'll try to post the next chapter as soon as I can, and I'm sorry that it's so short.


	10. Chapter 10

The sky was painted with multiple hues of colors, from yellow to red, from red to purple and from purple to the blue darkness that we oh, so love. Yet. At the end of every beautiful thing always lurks something dark.

Loneliness, sadness, hurt, love? Well, it depends in which case. And this case was purely disturbing, well maybe just for me? I don't know. Probably I'll never know as well. And I believe it's too soon to tell you guys too. The thing is... I wanted to figure it all by myself but there's no time. There is no time for some silly things. Now is today, and today, this hour and second I have to search for Sideswipe, that's what important now.

Every turn I took, every corner I overlooked I had hope, hope to see what I'm searching for, hope to see what I lost, hope... to find what I seek the most. But that never came. Who knew Chicago might be as big as it is? Definitely not me.

Bruised streets and broken down buildings were all over the place, nothing new here. Something that caught my eye were corpses, no, not human corpses. Cyrbertronian corpses! In an instant, I wished I could erase what I saw. Broken and battled bodies, torn off limbs and shattered glass, energon, energon was all over the place - already dried off, which made me wonder, how long were they laying here, like this, broken and lonely? The thought of that made me want to cry. Who would wish to die alone in a battlefield full of hate and sorrow? I believe no one. I wished I could change their fates but that's just a silly wish. _A wish for a better world_.

I tried to notice their paint colors, it was hard to, the bodies were all dismantled and gray, rust eating at it ends.

How can someone's fate be so cruel? Did they ask for this? I would've never believed that and I'm never going to. I hope they're at peace now, wherever they are, with whoever they are.

Leaving the corpses behind, I made my way further down the roads, observing, searching for any clues I may find, but there was just... nothing. I couldn't find anything but I was determined to. I had to find him and I will. I promised. I won't break a promise I made with my dearest friend. Never.

 _Friend_? It nagged me at the back of my head. My heart just begged me to notice _it_ , I refused to, I refused to acknowledge it. Was Sunny just my friend? _He is just my friend, nothing more._

Looking down on my feet I finally noticed something. It may not be a clue or something that'll lead me to Sideswipe but it was something about _me_. I ran up to a nearby window, the glass was slightly cracked but still intact. Firstly I looked myself in the eye. Were my eyes always so deep blue? Was my hair always so long and dark? Was I always so... young?

I backed up a step from the window, to see my whole body in it. Black shoes and a knee length black dress that moved with the wind while I moved hung on my shoulders.

 _Did I always look like this?_

I never noticed it before. I never looked at myself. It was... new.

Did Sunny notice it? Did he notice any change? Have I even changed? I'll have to ask him when I get the chance.

Somehow looking at my own reflection made me sad, there was something in my eyes that said "help me". Who knows? Because I don't.

Looking away, I made my way again down the streets, slowly the buildings were going out of my way, leaving just small homes on the sides of the road. Everything was abandoned. What caught my eye this time were the scratches in the pavement, they were no ordinary scratches, they looked like something was dragged down the street, two smooth lines... like someone dragged down... _a pair of swords_.

My mind stalled there for a moment. _Swords. A Pair of swords. Swords... Sideswipe!_ My eyes shot wide open, looking around for where the scratches lead. Quickly I noticed a small path between a line of trees and a house, soon I made my way there, my heart started to beat faster and louder. Was I about to find him? As I made my way through the path I started to hear... a song? Is that a song that I hear?

 _ **...Whispers in the air tell the tales of the brothers gone..**._

Just this one sentence made the hair on my back stand.

 _ **...Desolation, Devastation**_

 _ **What a mess we made!**_

 _ **When it all went wrong...**_

Is that Sideswipes voice? It seems so deep... and hurt. Like someone ripped his spark in _half_.

 ** _...Watching from the edge of the circus_**

 ** _For the games to begin..._**

My mouth fell open. It was him! I started to jog quickly but stopped in my tracks when I saw raw, recently lost energon on my way, splattered on some trees and on the path.

 _ **...Gladiators draw their swords**_

 _ **Form their ranks for Armageddon!...**_

Even if I was coming closer to the voice, it seemed more distant and more full of static. Completely ignoring the energon on the path, I was sure I was getting closer to what I searched for.

 ** _...I'm nuclear!_**

 ** _I'm wild!_**

 ** _I'm breaking up inside..._**

 ** _A spark of broken glass,_**

 ** _Defiled_**

 ** _Deep inside_**

 ** _The abandoned child..._**

I turned the last corner of the broken path, only to hear one of the most heartbreaking words that were sung by one of the most beautiful voice I've ever heard, even thought it was full of static and broken in some wicked way... it was still beautiful.

I spotted him under a half-broken tree, just sitting there and staring off into the distance while singing. His optics looked so... tired. Tired of being alive.

 ** _...Standing on the edge of the underworld_**

 ** _Looking at the abyss,_**

 ** _And I'm hoping for some miracle..._**

 ** _...To break out,_**

 ** _To escape from all this!_**

 ** _...Whispers in the air tell the tale..._**

 ** _Of a life that's gone_**

 ** _...Desolation, devastation_**

 ** _What a mess we made! -What a mess we made..._**

 ** _When it all went wrong... - When it all went wrong..._**

I sang those two sentences alongside him and made myself visible, he looked at me like he just saw a ghost - no wonder here, I am a ghost.

His optics went wide, he opened his mouth like he intended to speak but nothing was about come out. He just sat there like a gaping fish.

I put my hand over my mouth to muffle out the giggle that came out. I didn't mean to laugh but his expression! But I couldn't help it.

Soon I put my hand in the air and made a small wave towards him and said "Hi." with a gentle smile on my face. "How are you Sideswipe?"

And just like that, he closed his mouth and just stared at me but soon broke the silence.

"Do I know you?" He asked carefully.

"No you don't, but I wish you did." I really wished he did, but that's a second silly wish to make this easier.

"Why?" Was that curiosity that I heard in his voice? Of course.

"Because your brother send me here for you." I answered with an even bigger smile on my face. Maybe things were finally to lit up a little bit? I just hope for it.

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AN: Hello! I'm back after my exam and guess what? I passed! Yay! I'm free for the whole break! Probably I'll try to write more chapters! And a big thank you for those who reviewed on the last chapter, I really appreciate that. Btw. does this chapter count as a cliffhanger? 'Cuz I wanted to make one and I hope it worked out pretty well! Let me know if you liked this chapter or not! Please review!


	11. Chapter 11

"...Did you just say what I think you said?" He looked like he was about to faint, his hands started to tremble. Small tremors went up his spinal strut. Just like a small child who was about to finally see it's parents.

"I believe so." I answered him easily with a small smile. Slowly it disappeared when I realized the change in his stance.

His expression changed, going rigid. I couldn't describe the emotions that ran through his optics. Sadness, hurt, _pain._ "Where is he?!" Panic laced his voice. "I still can't reach him! I couldn't find him for so many years! Tell me!"

I didn't know what to do. I really didn't. I knew Sunny was watching. _I felt it._ I felt his gaze on the back of my head. Tears started to spill out of my eyes.

Just then Sideswipe gaped at me with his optics opening wide, he realized _it_.

Just then the feeling of being watched disappeared. _He doesn't want to see him in that state huh..._

"No... it can't be true.." He fell to his knees clutching at his broken spark. "Why... brother, why?!" Digging his claws into the grass underneath him making a choking noise. _He's crying._ "Why did you leave me behind?!"

Just the sight of him looking that way made me cry as well. _Is that why Sunny disappeared the moment he realized it?_

"Sideswipe..."

"No! Leave me alone!" _You stubborn child._

"He's waiting for you, I can't leave you. I promised him to bring you with me." His optics showed a faint glimmer of hope in them.

He picked up his head, finally gathering himself together and stood up.

"How can I believe you that you'll bring me to him?" He narrowed his optics into slits, not believing what I said. "He's dead."

"He is. But just in this world. You see... I'm a ghost." Smiling faintly I showed him my hand and made it disappear. He just stood there and gasped. "I don't know how long I was stuck with him in the limbo. I ended up in your place. You should be where I was for the whole time, yet, somehow you're standing here, before me, _alive._ "

"I... how? How did that happen?" _He's being all confused._ A good question, why is he still here? I have to take him quickly to Sunnys place.

"I don't know, but now I've found you" I smiled lightly at him happy about the fact. "Now, I promised your brother to take you to him, are you willing to come or are you staying here, all alone?"

He struggled with himself for a moment there, he didn't know as if to go forward or to stay in place. "I-I want to see him. I want to meet my brother again!"

Slowly and steadily I made my way towards him, I didn't know if I could touch him, _yet_ _I wanted to touch him so much._ I didn't know what type of desire it was. I just wanted to feel again, nothing more. Just then a feeling of calmness and warning washed over me. _Okay, alright, I won't touch._

I just stood beside Sideswipe staring up at him with giddy fingers and that damned smile.

"I understand. Well then. Shall we make that wish true?" I grinned even more at him. Oh god was it a good feeling to see someone excited like that.

"You know that if you want to see your brother it won't be the same as now, do you?" Yes, the change. He won't be able to live in the land of the living anymore. He'll be _dead._ Just as us.

"What do you mean?" He's second guessing. _Don't you dare say no now._

"I mean that you're going to die." And that was the sad truth.

He stalled, staring off into the dark skies, his optics boring a hole in the stars. "I'll be up there, right? I'll be with everyone... right? There's no pain nor sadness and devastation isn't it?" His voice was a mix of happiness and sadness at the same time.

"I believe so? I was never up there, but Sunny is, I know that... He himself told me." I wish he was here right now.

"Then there's no point of me staying here. I know that everyone else is ... dead as well. I saw it. I saw them dying. Why didn't I die with them? I tried, I tried so much to be gone but I couldn't... the fragging blade always just wobbled before my faceplates! As if it was laughing at me for my poor attempt! I want to see them again... I don't want to be alone..." his voice cracked a tad bit at the end, he was a mess.

"Were you human, I would've hugged the life out of you" at that he cracked up a small smile.

"You wouldn't have had the courage to touch me, I'm all rust now anyways." True, he was becoming all rusty and missing a part here and there but still you could say he was good looking.

"Sure, sure. Now, shall we go?" I turned away from him, making my way back the path.

"Okay... but where are we going?" He started walking, beside me. The wheels gone from his pedes. He didn't look at all the same like on the picture Sunny once showed me, the only thing that looked the same were his face and his claws... claws that were the same as Sunnys. Faded silver paint coated his rusty parts, scratch marks all over him. _He already looked death..._

"To the place where it all began. The place I met your brother. The place we shall pass on. The place where we will rest..."

"Oh..." He started going at the same pace as me, not rushing, not slowing down. "Just... what is my brother to you?"

I stopped in the middle of the street, staring up at him while he looked at me with wonder and fascination. _What is he to me? I don't really know._

"I... I don't know" Disappointment flashed through the air around me. _Stupid. "_ I wish I knew." I really did.

"...I'm sure you'll get to know soon." He started to walk again, leaving me behind.

I just stalled there for a short while longer before I noticed the fact he was good 50 meters away from me. "Hey, wait! You don't even know the way!"

"Haha, then catch up and show it to me!" He actually laughed.

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AN: Yes, I'm back and I'm sorry for the long delay of the chapter. Life ate me up. But I'm back and hopefully, I'll continue with the story! If someone is interested I actually started up a new story so check it out if you want to! Let me know what you think about this chapter! See you arround!


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